Saturday, June 16, 2012

Things didn't work out with the guy from POF in Toledo. Long story. Happy ending. However, in December, I received a message from a very interesting man on Plenty of Fish. We met right after Christmas while I was in Columbus for the holidays. He's half-Hispanic and our first date was at this quiet little Mexican restaurant. It's down the street from my sister's favorite "name" Mexican restaurant. The food was better and less expensive. We spent three hours getting to know each other there. The time went by so quickly, we were shocked when we realized how long we talked. Things went so well, we arranged to go to the movies at my favorite theater in the whole world, The Drexel, New Year's Eve. We saw "Girl With the Dragon Tattoo," then went to Graters next door for ice cream, coffee, and fruitcake! I went back to Toledo and we spent hours on the phone (at least one every night) talking to each other. He's a mathematical genius and freelance computer programmer. We really hit it off, so we had our third date at Barnes & Nobles in Columbus in January. By February, we were ready to spend Valentine's Day together and it was quite romantic. We had dinner supplied by me - he brought the wine - and our romance blossomed. He gave me the most beautiful card. I keep it on my desk at work to remind me how lucky I am to have him in my life. We see each other every month when I go to Columbus to visit my mother. I enjoy going to church with him and I've met a lot of his friends there. Our last "date" in Columbus was a few weeks ago. I invited him over to my mother's house for dinner. I cooked. He got to meet my mom and she was delighted to meet him. He also met my amazing niece and nephew, the smartest kids in the world! He was impressed. I'll be going to Columbus next week to see the man that has renewed my faith in love and men. He has a gentle, loving spirit. His priorities are his two children, his three grandchildren, his church, his work, and me. We don't always agree since we have differing political views, but we agree on the most important things: family, God, moral character, spirituality, peace, love, and our relationship which is also a friendship based on love and mutual respect. My first Plenty of Fish relationship didn't work out mainly because it was with someone that is disingenuous, narcissistic, and only interested in women he can control, manipulate, and use. I was heartbroken when I finally realized the truth last July. However, I quickly recovered, thankful that I found it out soon enough to sever any ties and heal any wounds that had been inflicted by someone whose only concern is himself. He went back to the woman he'd been married to for 33 years and divorced. I was contacted by a man I met on Tagged, that also lives in Columbus, and he met me a couple of times at the bus station when I came to town to visit my mother. We'd made plans to spend New Year's Eve together. Then he became too "busy" and I canceled. However, thanks to Thomas, my new love, I had a wonderful New Year's Eve, a memorable Valentine's Day, and now have a romance I think is true and lasting. We have both been bruised - he's been married twice - and hurt in the past, but still believe in love. One of the things we agree about most strongly is fidelity in a relationship and neither of us has any trouble trusting each other and our love for each other. In the past, most men I've dated have been jealous. Jealousy is debilitating and dangerous. I'm thankful that I've finally met a man that trusts me and that I can trust with my heart, my friendship, and my life. I know Thomas wants me to move to Columbus, but I just started a doctoral program and won't be leaving Toledo for a few years. I think our relationship can withstand the short distance and I'm still hopeful that he might consider moving. I know he wants to be near his children and grandchildren, but they're only a short drive away like my mother, sister, brother, and his two children. Thomas definitely wants to get married again and I've managed to avoid marriage and divorce. We'll see. I know he's the man I've been waiting for and the thing I like most is that he's not rushing me. My last POF "love" tried to rush me into matrimony. I teased Thomas on February 29th, Leap Day and Sadie Hawkins Day. I told him, "Don't worry, I'm not going to propose." With his quick and ready wit, he replied, "Good! Wait four more years, then ask!" We'll see. I'll let you know next Leap Year!

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